Are you tired of online colleges and universities
that only offer degrees? Are you looking for an online education that doesn’t focus only
on education? Well look no further because College University
Technical College Online is an online education just what the professor prescribed.
Instead of boring curriculum, or educational resources, CUTCO focuses on providing a complete
college experience. And more than just using a lanyard to carry
your school ID, or inappropriately wearing your high school athletic gear, CUTCO provides
its students with a full range of collegiate opportunities. At CUTCO you can attend a frat
party, join an intramural sports team or just hang out in your dorm room. Dorm room not
included. Looking to meet that special someone? College
is a great time to sleep around. At CUTCO you can find yourself a special sweetheart,
check out a new babe, have a threesome, or just try something new. Remember you’re a
college student! You’re just working through a phase. CUTCO strongly encourages students
to practice safe sex. CUTCO offers manageable class sizes of just
you. This allows students to sleep through a class, skip a class, befriend a professor,
or just cheat on a test. That’s the ticket. You’ll be cum laude in no time.
No quad? No problem! You can still enjoy all the fun in the sun activities from you down
house such as grilling up some lunch, going streaking, or a rousing game of beer pong.
Ha ha! In your face you stupid bitch. Hungry fella? Just because you go to school online
doesn’t mean you can’t eat like a college student. CUTCU’s meal plan consists of one
cup or ramen noodles, peanut butter, and one late night drunk pizza delivery service phone
number. Just watch out for the freshman fifteen. More than anything a CUTCO degree prepares
you for life in the real world because you have real life experience. And what is it
that you do sir? I write mean comments on YouTube videos. CUTCO did a phenomenal job
preparing me for life in the real world. I can’t thank them enough. Now if you’ll excuse
me, I have to get back to my nap. CUTCO offers opportunities off campus from
studying abroad, to internships, and even spring break.
So what are you waiting for? Call now, and get started avoiding all the work of actually
achieving a degree. This offer expires at midnight just like Cinderella.
So that’s pretty much everything I did in college. Um, if you like the video please
subscribe if you don’t like the video please subscribe. My name is Max No Sleeves and I’ll
see you next tuesday. And. Awesome guys, really cool. Fuck you.